The Challenge of Showing Up
This work…requires showing up with my whole self in divisive moments, holding both my humanity and that of the person I disagree with.
During my time working with the One America Movement over the past seven years, there have been shared meals and hard conversations in homes, lament for the suffering in our world, service to fragile communities, and listening to views of American politics through very disparate lenses. I have witnessed the complexity of people’s deeply held beliefs and how they can differ from the group they belong to. This has shaped much of my ministry and worldview.
And yet, I’m still on a bit of a learning curve. As someone naturally curious about how others think and live, I tend to see the best in people. I look for sincere intentions, even when I strongly disagree with someone—except for a few times. Enough times, though, that I’ve recognized a pattern.
In examining my exceptions, I realized I sometimes retreat into thoughts about “why that group is bad” and how they threaten my worldview. I usually find it easy to apply what I’ve learned about polarization and how to talk to my neighbor—until I’m faced with someone whose beliefs make me feel disqualified. When I feel diminished, it’s hard to stay curious and see their good intentions. It’s tempting to wish they would fail.
After a conversation with a friend who works on bridging divides, I did some soul searching and saw how my thoughts mirrored the very polarization I aim to address.
I had an epiphany: how I respond when my identity and beliefs feel threatened is part of addressing toxic polarization. This work doesn’t ignore trauma or dismiss accountability, but it requires showing up with my whole self in divisive moments, holding both my humanity and that of the person I disagree with.
In Luke 19, Jesus is traveling through Jericho and meets Zacchaeus, a corrupt tax collector who has climbed a tree to see him because the crowd won’t make room for the man who steals from them. Jesus sees him, knows his name, and invites himself to dinner at Zacchaeus’ house. Zacchaeus is astounded, and the crowd is outraged by the perceived injustice of the invitation.
That day changes Zacchaeus’ life. In imagining this scene, I see Jesus challenging him about the faith and experience he shares with his neighbors, asking, “Why would you treat them this way?” These words resonate deeply with Zacchaeus, and he commits to change. He recognizes the divide he’s created between himself and others, pledging to repay his debts fourfold.
The people on the street were likely still unsettled by the event, and the story doesn’t tell us what happened in Jericho the following days. But if Zacchaeus followed through with his promise—if he truly changed how he saw and treated his neighbors—his transformation would have healed not just him, but the community as well.
I live in Tulsa, where entrepreneurship is thriving, remote workers are flocking here, and our music and arts scene has exploded! Yet, we're also facing challenges that require repair—education gaps, a growing unhoused population, racial divides, and the lingering wounds from the 1921 Tulsa Race Massacre. On top of that, we're navigating steep political divides.
Our story mirrors many others across the country, where tremendous opportunities coexist with serious challenges. All of this exists under the shadow of growing toxic polarization, preventing us from becoming united communities and a united nation.
Indigenous Australian artist Dr. Lilla Watson once said,
"If you have come here to help me, you are wasting your time, but if you have come because your liberation is bound up with mine, then let us work together."
From Zacchaeus' story, one takeaway is that his community’s healing required his healing too. I believe Dr. Watson's words can guide us, especially when we find ourselves on opposite sides of a cultural divide, unable to see how to bridge the gap. I'm embracing the challenge of showing up to this work because I believe my country’s liberation from toxic divides is bound up with my own. Let's work together.
— Reverend Denise McKinney
Reverend McKinney leads The Well Community, a dinner church in Tulsa, and serves as Vice Chair on the board of The One America Movement.